Sorry - I've just seen this post

"Look out, that dogs about to piss up your leg! Whew it's ok, hes gone for the table leg instead."

A true story (& why I have used a pseudonym)

I was singing in a very small folk club.
My girlfriend was sitting in the front row six feet away from me.
A guy had his weimaraner with him.
The dog got VERY visibly excited & kept jumping on my lady.

I managed to finish the set without laughing but just wondered if any other catters have had to use the phrase,
'Would you mind stopping your dog from raping my wife?'