I think part of the problem, at least as I saw it in Seattle, was people coming new were given false information..even what time it started..they kept being told 7:30 when no critical mass was achieved until 8:30 or so.

Then they were told straight out, oh, anything is Ok. Well, it wasn't, but they weren't told. Just watch how the old-timers respond when the new ones wanted to sing "Today while the blossoms still cling to the vine." I think that is true test, that song. They would cringe, and pretend they didn't know it.

A kinder thing to do would be to say, this is what we tend to do, this is what we tend to like. But no one wants to say this and so everyone is uncomfortable. mg