Si permités que me meta, Andrés... It's a great translation, but there are a couple details I'd do differently.

You need a "that" in "Gave me two stars that when I open them..."

"El oído" is "hearing" a secas (no "the"), and likewise "la risa" is just "laughter", etc.

I'd translate "ojos claros" as "bright eyes", not "light eyes".

"Squalls" is an excellent translation of "chubascos", but in the context the first thing I thought of was phrases like "a squalling baby", so some 'Catters might appreciate knowing that the sense here is "storm".

Thanks for the translation! I'm just here on a hit-and-run for the first time in at least a year.