I once wrote a song parody, strictly for local consumption, about the strategy that the lawyer Bob Aaron adopted to guarantee that his practice's listing occupied its rightful first place in the alphabetical list of lawyers in the Toronto phone directory. My work included these four lines:

Unlike the aardvark, a beast that eats termites,
All Aarons find two "A"s sufficient,
Spelled that way in bibles for six hundred years,
Long before the one King James commissioned.