Actually, I can answer that. It was a holiday, a holiday, the first of all the year, and Al to the church had gone, all moody and interesting in check shirt and sandals, to see fair ladies there. Unfortunately, his well-established aversion to long ballads left him ill-prepared for what happened next. Fortunately for Al, Lord Barnard eventually saw the funny side, but the post-traumatic after-effects of the experience left him permanently unable to strike his trademark check-shirted moody pose, or to so much as look at a pair of sandals.

Kids! Don't let this happen to you! Learn a Child ballad today!