I am usually always running /struggling toward an unknown goal in these dreams until near the end, when I have done something criminal or wrong at the end which forces guilt and flight.

I am completely knackered this morning. I have been hunting and killing alligators (last night's or this morning's dream). I felt unbearable guilt at having to do this job. It was required for the protection of ?people? (don't ask me who). I had to do it and had to climb and run and haul heavy equipment around.

I am under stress. Worried about losing my job at Essex County Council, which is now interviewing the final contenders for outsourcing services (potentiall all services). 2 of the contenders are Capita (they don't have a very good track record in HR, recruting or IT so far) and Tata (just took over and laid off a load of workers from Corus Steel).

I am 50, I have limiting physical condition, I have virtually no savings or pension built up. So yeah I am a tad anxious. There are 28,000 council workers, most are worried. That would be one monstrous queue at the JobCentre.

I have also been watching the David Attenborough Planet Earth series every evening (though I hide my eyes during the predator bits). So my brain is rich with scenery and animal behaviour every night.

No meds, no cigareets, no whuskey and no wild wild women.

Diet has changed a bit. I have had more cheese than usual.