Having very recently been through a pretty tough health scare which included some potentially distressing surgery, I just wanted to add my voice to those who are incredibly humbled by and grateful for the standard of care and level of professionalism and emotional support offered by doctors and nurses in the UK.

My local hospital is only small, but they have a first class fast-track breast clinic. From the moment you walk through the door you are treated with dignity and respect, and fully informed about what is going to happen. Over several weeks I had nurses who held my hand, who let me cry on their shoulders, and who gave me the space I needed to deal with what I was going through as I needed to, not as they thought I should. This, I think, is the responsibility of the healthcare professional - the experience should be led by the patient and their emotional needs, not by misguided proselytising. If anyone had offered to pray for me, I would have responded politely I guess, though I would have found it somewhat inappropriate. If anyone had offered to pray WITH me, I would have probably been quite cross, to be honest, because I think it crosses a certain line of professionalism, is intrusive, and potentially exploits one's very real sense of vulnerability in a particularly distressing situation. As Dan very cogently pointed out, 'Again, the question is, "Whose need am I meeting, here?" If the patient has not been talking about religion, then the answer is probably, "My own." '

As someone with no spirituality to speak of, I believe there is a big difference between the pastoral, emotional care and sensitivity required in these circumstances and some notion of looking after a patient's "spiritual" well-being. It is perfectly possible to give the former without over-stepping into the latter. One of the questions on the hospital admission form is what religion you are. I can't help wondering whether nurses on various wards have access to this information, and whether the nurse in question took the answer into account before handing out prayer cards and offering to pray with people.

I should add that several friends and family who are Christian told me throughout me recent experience, "you're in my prayers". Even though they know I'm not a Christian, this was their way of letting me know they were thinking of me - my friend who is a Wiccan also told me she had her altar at the ready! I found this very sweet and kind. Somehow it is quite different (IMHO) from a stranger, a healthcare professional, in a hospital setting, offering to pray for/with you. Okay, I'm not really sure why. But it is. :)