Here's my poor offering (but at least it has a happy ending):

Aunt Edna, Where Have You Gone?
(Tune: Oh Lord Won't You Buy Me A Mercedes Benz)

Aunt Edna, Aunt Edna, where have you gone?
We're movin' and the furniture is out on the lawn,
I looked for your brass urn from dusk until dawn,
Aunt Edna, Aunt Edna, where have you gone?

Aunt Edna, Aunt Edna, oh where could you be?
I looked under the kitchen sink, I even climbed a tree,
Just rattle your bones, dear, if you can hear me,
Aunt Edna, Aunt Edna, oh where could you be?

Aunt Edna, you're a prankster, dead or alive,
You were always the cat's pajamas, hip to the jive,
Please, Auntie, quit hidin', it's givin' me the hives,
Aunt Edna, you're a prankster, dead or alive,

Aunt Edna, I'm sorry that we got evicted,
But the welfare check got lost and Bubba got convicted,
Do I look for you or skip town? Oh I'm so conflicted!
Aunt Edna, I'm sorry that we got evicted,

Aunt Edna, thank heavens, I just found your box,
I remember now, I put it in one of Bubba's socks,
And threw it out the window when the super changed the locks,
Aunt Edna, thank heavens, I just found your box!