The metronome shouldn't be treated like a wire frame or a coat hanger of sorts around which the music has to be forced to fit, that isn't its purpose.

Its job is to train a musicians internal sense of timing - in the process it often exposes to musicians as they practice just how ropey their sense of time is.

A good way to use it that helps to make the process more enjoyable and practice more musical is to set it to half speed and have the clicks on beats 2 and 4 so that beats 1 and 3 are in the players head.

Thus it serves to act like a jazzers hi hat, a bodhran players rimshot, a reggae players sksnk etc.

Train with a metronome and the result is less of a sense of panic about getting the tempo right, a feeling of "space" to think about expression and timing of notes and a feeling of confidence in ones own internal timing which manifests in strong clear and coherent articulation of notes and phrases.

For the listener this results in a more enjoyable explicit sound, and for anyone playing along it seems somehow easier.

Having a well developed internal clock affects everything from the tone quality to ease with which a group gels together.

The other thing is of course that your fellow musicians will tend to gravitate towards the one whose timing is most reliable for reassurance as they too are instinctively striving for the same goals.