Well, Amos, I'm also working on a song...here's what I have so far:

My whisk is rusty, my apron's rent
My tocque is damp with grease
And the hollandaise and the barley grains
Are thick in my Salade Nice
But my pans are as bright as my sweetheart's eye
My spatula's strong and free
What care have I for your reciepts or books?
I'm a cookin' Rapaire, I'm a cookin' Rapaire.