Don: .."I really need nothing from either you or Little Hawk. Nor do I expect anything..."

Maybe that's been your, and your son's problem. It's all been about YOU.
Perhaps, recognizing that, imagine how he felt, excluded, while the little engine in him, kept longing for a loving father's attention, and approval.....
A boy gets his masculinity from his father, not his mother. Men, can't face the admission of failure, much like women can't own up to, 'It's my fault, I was wrong.'
Funny, how the 'Peace-Love' generation, grew up to be so self centered, and how our children literally suffered from lack of attention, and to fend for themselves, and learn from the streets.
I gathered from your posts, that you had a religious upbringing, and since, have turned bitter at that too.
Suggestion: Let your son know, that you're sorry, for not being there, when he needed you, and how truly important he is to you, and ask him to open up to you. Give him a hug, and hold onto him/each other, as if for dear life. Let him cry on your shoulder. There may be a lot more that he'd like to say to you...probably how much he wanted you..if you'd open up in that way. Pull out the guitar, sing him a song..let him know HE was more important to you, than YOU were to being about YOU. See what happens.
And Don, this isn't about imagining winning anything, in a blog. Its about the love between those who we love, and love expressed, to each other.. Must we have heartbreaks, BEFORE we fall to our knees?
Truly Don, The Best, for both of you,
GfS