A skeleton walks into a bar, orders a beer and a mop....
Three guys walk into a bar, you'd think one of 'em woulda seen it!!
A man walks into a confessional and says, "Father, I'm 80 years old, I have 4 kids and 15 grandchildren and I've lived a good life but last night I strayed. I spent the night with two 18 year olds and we did nothing but drink and have sex all night." The priest asks, "My son how long has it been since your last confession?" The guy responds, "Father, I've never been to confession before, I'm Jewish." The priest is puzzled and asks, "Well then my son, why are you telling me this?" And the guy says, "Are you kidding me Father, I'm telling EVERYBODY!!!!"
Two nuns riding their bikes to school, because of construction, have to take a different route down a cobblestone road. One says, "I've never come this way before." The other says, "well, maybe it's the cobblestones!"