I have had face to face experiences with the BNP and had a drink in a BNP pub

I have no matching experience but, personally, I would not simply dismiss the BNP as a group of thugs. I think the ability to wear a (to some) more appealing face exists and is more worrying.

If I lost a friend to the BNP, it would be difficult to know what to do about it,

I don't know what I would do if a friend or family was involved.