The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #121627 Message #2657514
Posted By: Rusty Dobro
16-Jun-09 - 05:25 AM
Thread Name: Lyr Add: A Song for the Louses of Parliament
Subject: Lyr Add: A SONG FOR THE LOUSES OF PARLIAMENT
This seems to be touching a chord with audiences, for some reason.... Apologies (not for the first time) to the excellent Mr Paxton.
What did you learn in the House today, dear MP of mine?
What did you learn in the House today, dear MP of mine?
I learnt that greed is always good,
And you'd be doing it too, if you could,
And that's what I learnt in the House today, that's what I learnt in the House.
So what did you claim in the House today, dear MP of mine?
What did you claim in the House today, dear MP of mine?
I claimed an accountant to fiddle my tax,
I claimed for a duck-house, quack quack quack,
That's what I claimed in the House today, that's what I claimed in the House.
Anything else for the House to pay, dear MP of mine?
Any little thing you've forgotten to say, dear MP of mine?
I claimed for a mortgage I haven't got,
And 23 grand to cure dry rot,
I claimed for DVD's of porn,
And poison for the moles that dig up my lawn,
Eight grand for a plasma screen,
Wages for the lady who comes in to clean,
A spruce-up for my mansion's moat,
The laundry bill for my winter coat,
The bill for a wreath that I laid down,
Oh, and let's not forget my flat in town
Though I change address every now and then
So I can claim the whole lot again,
That's part of what I claimed in the House today
That's what I claimed from the House.
So what did you tell the House today, dear MP of mine?
How did you explain that lot away, dear MP of mine?
I sobbed as though my heart would break,
I said it's all a big mistake,
I don't know why I did what I did,
And I offered to pay back fifty quid
And that kept them quiet in the House today,
That kept them quiet in the House.
So what will you do when we go to vote, dear MP of mine?
What will you do when we go to vote, dear MP of mine?
I'll move to Bermuda with my stash:
A massive great pension and a shed-load of cash.
I'm in disgrace but I won't feel sad,
'Cos the next lot will be just as bad,
So pay your taxes to foot the bill,
As we get our fingers in the till,
It's a wonderful life in the House today,
It's a wonderful life in the House.