Akenaton, I've never referred to you as a homophobe -- I have no idea if you are or not, since I can't see inside your head. Just as you don't know anything about my mindset in an Orwellian sense.

The names I have called you have been, in my world, names you have earned by your statements. I believe that denying civil rights to a group of people is bigotry. I believe that advocating government intrusion into people's marriages and sex lives, as you do by calling for gay marriage to not be legalized, is a form of perversion. I believe you have thereby forfeited the right to have your own sex life kept private. The names you have called me and the conclusions you've drawn about me are not supported by anything I have said.

Trying again, just because you seem like an intelligent person who thinks he's doing the right thing:
You have never addressed the civil rights issue at all. In this life we often have to compromise between two mutually exclusive ideas. Even if you think that gay marriage is a very bad idea for whatever reasons you have, isn't the denial of civil rights an even worse idea? It's sort of like abortion -- no one thinks abortion is ever a good idea, but most of us have concluded that forcing a woman to bear a child against her will is an even worse idea, as is government interference in intensely personal decisions, like who you get to marry. We are asking you to conclude that the denial of civil rights is worse than the hypothetical danger of admitting homosexuals into normal society.