To the tune of "The Wild Rover" :-

I've been a wild Turkey for many a year
And I live in New Jersey, not a place of good cheer.
I don't mean to harm any residents there,
But they say that I chase them and I don't think it's fair.

And it's no nay never,
No never no more.
Will I visit Hillside Avenue
Cos the folks are a bore.

This guy was erecting a sign "Garage Sale"
When he glanced down towards me he quickly went pale.
I moved in his direction, him to reassure,
But he ran away from me and through his front door.

And it's no nay never,
No never no more.
Will I visit an erection,
Of that I am sure.

I saw the towns mailman deliver his lot,
I did not know if he'd be friendly or not.
He ran and I knew that he must have crossed wires,
But it made me quite angry so I pecked at his tires.

And it's no nay never,
No never no more.
Will I befriend a mailman,
Cos one hurt me before.

I've tried to be friendly with others as well,
But they all seem to treat me like I am a bad smell.
And when I approach them my story to tell,
They all come to greet me with a clap, stomp and yell.

So it's no nay never,
No never no more.
Will I stay in New Jersey.
I'll become their Folk Lore.