The year was 1971, the place, Rogers High School in SW Michigan, Mr. Yonkers' Senior English class -- Dave, Jeff, Dane, Russ, and a few others amused ourselves with the following milder version...

The Ballad of Piss-Pot Pete

There was a school marm way out west
Where the women are wild and the screwing is best.

She was tough, and I'll tell ya, pard,
She laid many a man in the ol' school yard.

When she laid, she laid for keeps,
And piled her victims in great big heaps.

Now up Bare Ass Creek where women are sweet,
Lived a son-of-a-bitch named Piss Pot Pete.

Pete was a man both big and strong
and had a tool nearly three feet long.

There wasn't a woman who could boast of saying
That she had taken the whole thing laying.

When Lou heard of Pete's great big tool,
She challanged him to a screwin' duel.

Twenty jars of vasoline were used that night
To prepare Pete's tool for the coming fight.

People came from miles around
To watch Pete and Lou go round-n-round.

The climbed the hills and took a seat
To watch that half-breed sink his meat.

The fight was rough on Bare Ass Hill --
After twenty rounds they were going still.

Lou did tricks and lots of stunts
Completely unknown to common cunts.

Ol' Lou knew that she had met her fate,
But backing out now was just too damned late!

When she passed out with a sigh ... and a cough,
There stood Piss Pot Pete ... Jacking OFF!!!