Within their conscious frame of reference, yes, they know what they are doing and why. But there is a greater truth that they have not become aware of yet. And that is why I choose to forgive them, but not necessarily to ALLOW them, if I'm in a position to do anything about it. You forgive children, but you don't allow them to be destructive, you discipline them. Properly applied discipline is a form of love...of course, it's a very fine line, so I won't pretend to have the final answer on where that line begins or ends for anyone in particular.