How about if I get you on the floor and give you a KFC rubdown, after which I'll hold you down and munch your giblets? Kendall can go off elsewhere and tell some longwinded tale about the guy from Kennebunkport who lived his entire adult life, except his 27th year, with a lobster up his ass sideways........or some other equally bizarre story about a family of tap dancers in Augusta that has passed through 6 generations and never left the street they live on except to buy toilet paper once each year on May 16th.

If no rubdown with a birthday lickin', then let me say simply Happy Birthday! But I tell ya' a rubber sheet and a bucket of original recipe could be a whole lot more fun.............


Spaw