Definitions are requested for a new Anglo/American dictionary. All definitions should be for existing words, and derived from current usage/spelling/pronunciation. Definitions may also be derived from analogous(see below) terms.
To start the spherical object rolling:

analgesic (n) drug producing a numb bum
analog (n) stool sample
analogous (n) personal stool sample
analogy (n) the study of arseholes (see below)
arseholes (n pl) bottoms of our feet
asterisk (n) compulsive gambling
bilious (sentence) you may refer to me as William
bumper (v) make her pregnant
bumpkin (v) interbreed
campus (n) group of drag artists
defender (n interj) pull that girl close (cf fender)
edit (n) blow to the skull
fender (n interj) push that girl away
gaiter (n interj) restrict girl to the premises
haliard/halyard (n) computer calculated distance in Kubrick's 2001
incontinent (n) European (excluding British Isles)
obelus (v) put chains on our ankles
parsimonious (v) give us your cash
pubic (adj) relating to taverns
punic (adj) relating to wit
rectum (v) put beyond use
tautology (n) education (literally, the science of that which is taught)
Zapata (n) lines spoken on stage between songs