The Confessional
Part III

"Oh, you were just distracted. What were you thinkin' about, Alice?"

        "Don't remember, but these silly things we do at our age puts me to mind of something. You remember Miss Winnie Jewell?"

        "How could I forget. She was the sourest old Sunday School teacher we ever had."

        "Yes, baptized in vinegar as they say. You like this paisley Melva, or is it too busy?"

        "Depends on what you where it with. What about Miss Winnie?"

        "Oh yes. Well you remember them pill box hats we used to wear to church, with the veils in front?"

        "UhHuh."
        
        "Well, Miss Winnie had that god-awful, cobalt blue thing. 'Member, with the peacock feathers in it?"

        "No, I don't recall that hat."

        "It may have been before you joined the church. Anyway it had a dark, grey veil. One Sunday we were taking Communion. Well, I wasn't 'cause I hadn't accepted yet, only 17 at the time. Miss Winnie, she was old then."

        "I know! She must've invented dirt. Here zip this up in back there."

        " 'Xactly! Well, when they were partakin' of the Body, Miss Winnie just popped that little cracker into her mouth, without liftin' the veil. She was just munchin' along when all of a sudden she fell out of the pew and onto her knees, fairly screaming, 'Praise be unto Gawd. He's holden' mah face, and the room is growin' dahkuh.' Well anyone with the sense of a post could see what happened. But she just kept on with 'the crackuh has a diffe'rnt textuh. Surely Gawd is callin' me foh some good purpose.'   And she rolled her eyes and said to the ceiling, 'but Ah'm unwuthy Lord.' And she swooned away.

        "Alice! She ate her veil?"

        "Yes, and thought she was having a religious experience. Melva, I like that dress. Coral suits you, it's a very good color."

        Tears of mirth were streaming down my face at this point. My sides were aching from holding the laughter in. I knelt on the floor and used the little bench as a writing desk. I must record it, all of it.