The hardest part is facing and accepting the reality that Alcoholism is an illness that can only be cured by the alcoholic, and only once they have admitted to themselves that they have a problem.
You can have no bearing on the situation whether by shouting, crying, caring, trusting or loving.
He may love you, but he is unable to make that a priority because he is an addict.
You exist outside of his alcohol defined world.
You have learned, with great patience and love and care that no matter how you try, your efforts all wind up achieving the same result ...
... you getting hurt, let down, ignored, taken for granted, and to an undisclosed extent, even abused.
You have only one way to end that cycle ...
... extricate yourself from it!
Crow sister said to stay with a family member or friend that will trust you and support you.
I would second that and add that this person should ideally be non judgemental about your husband.
They need to understand that this is not about who's right or wrong, or who's bad or good, but that you have been suffering from your husbands alcoholism and that you are putting an end to your suffering, without malice or any ill will.
This process isn't about him.
This process is about you reclaiming your life for yourself and freeing yourself from the tyranny of his illness.
He may also chooose to be free of his illness one day but that is something that you cannot control.
That is the hardest thing to face but the most important thing.