In the days of British rule, a young officer gets shipped out to India, straight from Sandhurst, as green as can be.
He arrives at the camp and his fellow officers fill him in on all the local customs and warn him of the dangers to be found in the jungle.
He asks about the deadly King Cobra and is told not to worry about cobras, they'll just pose and hiss but if you back away they'll just slink off into the jungle.
They told him, however, that the Yellow Banded Crate is the snake to watch for. Very deadly and very agressive. and that if he sees one, his only chance is to grab it by the tail and quickly slide his other hand up it's body and grab it behind its head so that it can't bite.

Well he goes off into the jungle and returns a while later, barely able to walk, clothes torn to shreds, blood everywhere.
They give him a large brandy and when he has recovered enough to speak, they ask him "What the hell happened to you".

He says "Well I was walking through the jungle and saw this King Cobra. I remembered what you said so I stepped back and, sure enough, it slid off into the jungle. I walked a little further and then I saw it - The Yellow Banded Crate - I was terrified. But I remembered what you had told me. So I grabbed it by the tail and quickly slid my other hand along its body, and,...
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...Have You ever tried sticking your finger up a tiger's arse?"