Screw it, just go. We'll let you into Canada--as everyone has pointed out this is an American program, the Western Hemisphere Travel Initiative--and when you go to re-enter the US, they'll give you a lecture and let you in. There is no NO MAN'S LAND.
Just take your best ID--your expired passport, in fact--it's technically not valid of course but still carries weight. and maybe get a notarized note from someone official where you live. Or just fake it and tell em you didn't realize it was expired--probably your best bet.
OR just stay...a fine singer as yourself would be welcome of course