Just been having big talks with my daughter and, as I understand it, the problem is more about the fact that it is all so damn public......grandparents, aunts ,uncles etc. all want to know how you've done, it's all over the news and papers so they can't forget and......if you plough them......you have to tell people so......Jaysus, what a pig!! What to do if you have ploughed them is almost a secondary consideration.......glad I don't have to go through this crap any more.