All mine have been sad since 2005. And they shall be forever more. And it is terribly selfish of me, but I cannot help it.

I used to resent my Dad, because he always went into depression at Christmas. His Dad died on Christmas day, when he was in hospital somewhere in Europe recovering from bomb blast (WWII). I thought he was selfish because he wouldn't get happy for his children's sake.

Now I have lost my daughter, and feel the same way during holiday's, so I can't blame him. If I could control my happiness, like Scarlet O'Hara I sure as hell would.