GfS - here I go again, making points I know you'll ignore, but hey ho....

As a homosexual, I have never given very much thought at all as to whether my sexuality is genetic or not. It doesn't matter to me, honestly it doesn't. Interestingly, it seems to matter hugely to straight people, on both sides of this rancorous debate. (Indeed, I sometimes get concerned when liberal/'gay=friendly' straights try and argue on this turf - I fear you're playng into the hands of the homophobes, so be very careful.)

I don't care why I'm gay, I'm just happy that I am. I don't see myself as some sort of 'lab rat'. Whatever the balance of biological and societal factors, my sexual orientation is part of (but not the whole of) my core identity. Why should it matter to anyone how it happened ? Please explain why it interests you so much - I would be genuinely interested to know.

And as for the notion of 'changing' sexual orientation, this does happen - it happens (as I've said before) when individuals feel pressurised to change, in various 'directions', by political or religious or otherwise ideological beliefs. This does indeed challenge the 'it's all genetic' argument.

It also happens when people fall so much in love with someone that their previous sexual choices seem unsustainable.

Two of my best friends are women who live together in the most loving relationship that I know. When they met, one was married to a man, the other recently separated from a husband. Both had two children. Neither had ever had same-sex relationships before. Even now they don't use the word 'lesbian' to describe themselves, unless others insist that they do.

Eighteen years later, they are still together. Everyone in the scenario is very contented, even the former husbands, apart from one of the women's daughters. I feel for her and I'm sorry that she can't find it to accept how things are, but in my view she has no right to elect herself the sole adjudicator on how her mother chooses to be happy.

I know, GfS, that you would instinctively zooom in on that one angry and unsupportive person & prioritise her wishes above everyone else. And this is because you always, always put the happiness of heterosexuals above the happiness of others. You are irretrievably prejudiced that way. You cannot take off those blinkers. You seem trapped in a mindset premised on venom and retribution. I feel sorry for you.

I have gone on about this example because to me the matter of sexuality is not about statistics & percentages & 'science', it is about the almost-always-messy world of emotions and feelings and relationships. It's a complicated world out there. I think you should acknowledge that.