Smokers Are Scum;         12-25-09, by C.Denney
(a holiday song; gentle commentary on one of the obvious perils of street performing)

I play the street fairs
I play from the heart
fiddle and guitar
and squeezebox for art
we play for the old folk
we play for the bums
but we don't play for smokers
cause smokers are scum
smokers are scum
smokers are scum
they know they're addicted
they know smoking's dumb
they know that exposure
is deadly to us
but they're hoping we're stupid
and won't make a fuss

smokers are addicts
they know smoking kills
they're too frigging lazy
to smoke somewhere else
what's the big problem
with walking away
I wish their smoking
would kill them today
smokers are fools
smokers are fools
they shill for tobacco
like industry tools
making us share
their addiction's a farce
take your stupid cigarette
and shove it up your arse

don't light up near me
because if you do
I got a squirt-gun
and my aim is true
folks think they're helpless
but I say they're not
pick up some bug spray
give smokers a shot
smokers are stupid
and ugly and dumb
smokers expose you
cause they think it's fun
they won't smoke elsewhere
because it's too tough
smoking will kill them
but not fast enough

(bridge)
it gets in your clothing
it gets in your hair
cause asthma cause cancer
but smokers don't care
the deep inconvenience
of walking away
it too hard for smokers and
that's why I say

pick up some bug spray
some air freshener too
don't let a smoker
light up next to you
their rights have ended
where your lungs begin
pick up your squirt-gun
and baby you win
they'll poison your street gig
they'll poison your lungs
they won't put on patches
or just chew some gum
they're screwed-up and stupid
and ugly and dumb
they'll poison their mothers
cause smokers are scum
(coda)
be glad it's just bug spray
instead of a gun (…hold…)
they'll poison their mothers
cause smokers are scum