I don't know where I got these words; not in the DT. Didn't have a tune provided, so I "wrote" my own.

Four Stages of Drunkenness

G                D7         C    G          D7                        G
There is that jo-cose drunk-ard as you may com-pre-hend,
G                      D7    C               D7                                 
He's full of jokes and laugh-ter, and every-one's his friend;
    G          C       G                   D7          G
He slaps you on the back, me lads, and or-ders up a round,
G    C                   G                  D7                G
That jolly jo-cose drunk-ard's a pleasure to be found.


Chorus:

      
   C      D7             G
And you raise your glass,
C               G
Times have passed,
       D7                            G
And all the lads have gone home.


One drink beyond the jocose and then it's time for tears,

For now the drunkard is morose, he's crying in his beer;

He gets so sentimental, nostalgic and depressed,

He grieves for all he might've been and wails about the rest.

Chorus:


And you raise your glass,

Times have passed,

And all the lads have gone home.




But when the crying ceases, let the innocent beware,

For now the drunkard's bellicose, with fighting spirit rare;

He loudly picks an argument and wildly swings his fist,
                     
So bellicose a drunkard's a pleasure to be missed.

Chorus:


And you raise your glass,

Times have passed,

And all the lads have gone home.


The drunkard then becomes subdued, the liquor takes its toll,

For now the drunkard's comatose, 'tis said he's passed out cold;

These are the states of drunkenness through which we all may sink,

But, before we all are comatose there's time for one last drink!

Chorus:

And you raise your glass,

Times have passed,

And all the lads have gone home.

DRO