The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #59418   Message #2808988
Posted By: Bee-dubya-ell
11-Jan-10 - 09:01 AM
Thread Name: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
No, Gluon is not naturally bilingual. He* would be if he'd had an opportunity to learn duck or dog from either of his parents, but the actual time Gluon spent with his parents was tragically short. He fell out of his cradle the day after he was bratched** and accidentally slipped into a seventeen-dimensional vortex. It took him roughly 350 of our years to find his way out of the vortex (though it only seemed like a few seconds to Gluon). By the time he returned to our spatial plane, his parents were not even distant memories to anyone else. He found himself alone, and with an insatiable craving for cracked corn mixed with Alpo. He also found that the only sound he was innately capable of making was "QUARK!", and while he has learned to convey an unlimited number of meanings using that one "word", he has recently felt a desire to "get in touch with his roots" by learning the duckspeak and dogspeak of his long lost parents.

* Gluon is not literally a "he" nor a "she", but something in between. The author has referred to Gluon as "he/she/it" in the past, but finds that construction too bulky. Therefore, we've arbitrarily chosen to use "he" for the sake of convenience. You are free to use whatever pronoun you choose.

** Bratched: A cross between "born" and "hatched". It's uncertain whether Gluon was born live, hatched from an egg, or some hard to imagine combination of the two.