I can certainly see your point. It's sometimes not apparent to someone taht a person could take offense to something we're singing, saying, or doing... I think everyone's been in a situation where maybe someone said something that they meant in jest or felt was a harmless statement to make, and it hurt nevertheless.
I think that it is impossible to never say, do, or sing anything that offends... inevitably, someone will always hear what you say and ttake it in a different context, or perhaps infer an intent that wasn't there. We can only do our best to try to be mindful of what we say and do.
Aine, I meant to say this before. I feel awful that you experinced hurt because of this song and because of my friends' performing it. Please know that they would never have intentionally done a tune that would be offensive. I know that my apology doesn't make up for anything, nor can i say that they will not play the tune anymore. It is a very popular one with audiences, and taken in the intended context, is not offensive to most people. But i am sorry that you had a bad experience at the show you attended.
p.s. I'll try and get an mp3 of this tune posted at download.com sometime this week if anyone is interested in actually hearing it who hasn't already.