Thanks Paul — I take your point now.

I must say I think there is more hostility to GfS than is absolutely warranted — I find her accounts of her marriage and its satisfactions very moving — especially as my own, tho childless, brought me before it was snatched away from me all the true happiness I have had thruout my long life: but, as I have said, she makes IMO the mistake of being over-prescriptive of 'only one way', & lacking in empathy — points to which she seems oddly reluctant to rejoin.