Squidge is a thickened stew. Best done in slow cooker.

A tiny bit of water in the bottom of the slow cooker. Add a flavouring (oxo or similar for meat ones, marmite for vegan) and a thickener (bisto or similar for meat ones, cornflour sauce or flour roux for vegan).

Fry onions and add.

If making "hot" version, black peppercorns.

If meat, fry little lumps of meat and add.

In saucepan, heat chopped toms.

Add sliced or chunked root veg - carrots or turnips or swede, or little potatoes.

If making hot version, add chopped chillis.

Add garlic (lots).

Add paprika (lots) and basil (lots) and oregano (lots) and maybe some jeera or kala jeera.

Simmer for a few minutes.

Dump it in the slow cooker.


About an hour later, put sliced leek across the top and if necessary add water to make sure the leek is in water. You can also add sliced aubergine or chunked courgette if so minded.

About an hour later add thickener - could be pearl Barley, could be pulses if you remembered to soak them overnight the night before.

About an hour later you might want to add a couple of sliced mushrooms, not too many they can be overpowering.

About an hour later add chopped celery and/or sliced big peppers.

You can concatenate those hour intervals if so wishing but then the courgette, celery and peppers tend to go mushy.

Go to pub for several hours and sing folk song.

Return - last minute thickening if needed (eg if you have people who hate runny stew) with instant mash.

Eat, burp, go home.






Now, the likely assemblage will include maybe two vegans and a couple of vegetarians as well as some who turn thier noses up at anything without meat in - so I HAVE to do meat and non-meat.

Some however (like me) like flamethrower fuel, but some like fairly or very mild.


So the only option is to do one meat, and a non-meat (one in slow cooker one in crock in oven) and have an instant octane booster ("hot sauce") on hand that the dragons can stir into their bowl of squidge at serving time.   Not a side serving of relish.


For the "hot sauce" the aim is more an indian-influenced flavour than a Mexican one. I have elsewhere been given:

"Hot Pepper Sauce

Habanero peppers and/or
Jalapeno peppers and/or
Cayenne peppers and/or
Hot chili peppers
Approximately 2 cups, total (of the peppers)

1 head unpeeled garlic
1 cup red wine vinegar
1 T. sugar


Directions:
The exact proportions of the various types of peppers above can be varied depending on your personal tastes and what you have available. For a milder sauce, milder varieties such as Hot Wax, Banana, Pimento, or Bell peppers can be substituted for a portion of the hot varieties listed above.

Using rubber gloves, clean and de-seed approximately 2 cups of peppers. In a saucepan, combine the peppers, garlic, and vinegar and cook, covered, over low heat for approximately one hour. Keep an eye on the liquid and reduce heat and add more vinegar if it seems to be boiling away quickly. Press through a sieve or a food mill, add the sugar, and return to low heat for approximately 30 minutes or until slightly thickened. Pour into a jar or bottle which can be sealed and refrigerate. Will keep in refrigerator for several months"



I will not seed the chillis (maybe scotch bonnets), probably use wine not vinegar (no Moslems coming, and even if there were it would surely be true that the alcohol boils off so they should be OK) and I will smash everything to wossname in a blender before cooking.

So long as there are no observant Jews coming (my kitchen is very non-kosher anyway) I might use a little milk in the sauce as well as a vehicle for the chilli. I might add some cumin, coriander, and honey too.