Herewith my post starting the LC WS Freds this year: -

Subject: Lower Coke Winter sings (Kent, UK)
From: Richard Bridge - PM
Date: 05 Jan 10 - 06:58 PM

OK, after much blandishment, and Paddy and the landlord Peter both having bribed me with alcohol, and having taken due account of the risk of re-appearing on the 'cat, here is the eagerly awaited announcement of the Lower Coke (Upper Dogsbotham) winter sings, on the ground that no-one else appears to be doing anything competitive. Folkies do not compete, they co-exist. It is the music of the people.

Right. Here is the plan.

From opening time until closing time or earlier surrender to darts matches, darts competitions for the Sunday joint (meat, what else might I have meant?) foolsball on the square eyed God - usually till about 6-ish or 7-ish on the following Sundays: -

Jan 31
Feb 28
Mar 21.

Where? Oh, silly me! The Nag's Head, Lower Stoke, Near Rochester, Kent, ME3 9RD. It's in Hogarth's diaries doncher kno?

Promises of a real fire (maybe 2), roast spuds, maybe some Yorkshire puds, proper beer under gravity on the bar, and great acoustics thanks to the wood floor. NB if you have specific real beer requests for Kentish Beers or Beers of Kent, PM me URGENTLY as beer arrangements are likely to occur on Monday 11 Jan. Beer ties being what they are suggestions for non-Sheps beers will be treated confidentially, hint, hint.

If I like you selected invitees may, in my discretion, receive squidge in my gaff over the road on termination. Squidge comes in variants. Basically there will be veggie (actually I mean Vegan for the real fanatics) stoo, plus the adjuncts to vary it: there may be a pot of meat stuff to turn the meat into meat stoo, and a pot of very peppery and chilified stuff to turn either the meat stoo or the Vegan stoo into dragon fuel – stand back and strike match (at either end). At least that is the plan. Remember I have a dog and my lodger has a cat, so allergenists may be discommoded.

You will then kindly please F orf to assist me to be unpleasant at work on Monday.

Paddy is back in the village and may bring his banjo, so please encourage him. I propose to message Jeff, perhaps the best serial murderer on the clawhammer guitar in the county. I have just tonight met a traveller who may invite some of the local travelling families who remember the old songs to come (this is a long shot, I have been after one of the Rai to come and sing old songs for some time, to no avail – he prefers Elvis.)

All guarantees warranties and/or conditions and/or innominate terms, express or implied, whether statutory or otherwise, save as expressed above are hereby excluded. I accept no liability of any kind or nature whatsoever.

Any attendee by act or omission causing any actual or alleged damage or liability to me will on demand keep and hold me fully and effectually indemnified against any cost claim or liability of any nature whatsoever arising out of the event or their attendance.

I can keep exclusion clauses up for hours. All of them apply."

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