The IRDL came after me for for a wicked wrist shot up against the baby barn doors with my Yvonne Cournoyer autographed Victoriaville hockey stick. It was a mouse, not a rat! Those rat Nazi's will stir up trouble wherever they can.

They claimed it was a rat and said they had a witness... a neighbour... one a them there tree huggin, ratsass kissin yuppies. But, since there was no evidence after Maggie ate the varmint, they decided not to continue in court because it woulda cost a lot to try to get DNA samples confirmed. Even if they coulda lifted any DNA from the baby barn, they woulda had a hard time proving that DNA was from the rodent I scored a goal with.

They did ask a judge for a search warrant to seize Maggie's litter box but the judge said, "Get the fuck outta here you crazy bastards."

My barrister and solicitor has advised me not to say anything about the pending case involving mice in the neighbour's mailbox.