Joseph O'Connor - whether this was recollected from his own childhood I don't know - has one of his characters claim: 'I'm so hungry I could eat a nun's arse through a convent gate!'

And Pinter - again, was this invention or recollection? - has one of his more aggressive characters describing another as 'smelling from arsehole to breakfast time.'

And an Ulster friend of mine would always use, instead of 'a stone's throw from' or 'within earshot of' the lovelier 'within a hound's gowl of' - gowl being a howl, yelp, bark. I've appropriated that one.