I don't know the necronomicon, LH!
Circles of White Light are good for keeping things away, if not that, there's always throwing down a comb and having it turn into a forest, stuff like that.
(I don't know if they'll keep the smell away though...)

Anyway.
Here's to this thread:

A musician, when stuffed full of gin,
Was heard to declare with a grin
"I'll play 'em all,
Big to quite small,
But the instrument I love best, is skin."

Is that twisty enough fur ya?