I have always said that acceptance is far far better than tolerance. But there are some things that people find unacceptable for themselves that they do tolerate in other people. Tolerance is better than intolerance.

In counselling one can have your own issues and be allowed them, as long as you know what they are and do not let them affect your ability to counsel. If you know it is going to then you have a duty to pass the client onto someone you know better suited to help them. However, if you are employed to counsel certain types of problem, and accept that post, then you say you will not do it, you are bound to 'come unstuck'.

I know some brilliant counsellors in some areas that would be useless in others. They know it too. Counsellors spend huge amounts of time on personal development and knowing themselves. They also have supervision to aid them make the right choices. Going into a job where you know you will be expected to deal with problems that you cannot handle because of your own belief system/prejudices or whatever makes no sense.

Counsellors are human too and are entitled to have their own feelongs and emotions on subjects. What they are not allowed to be is discriminatory in the role they are employed in. Such questions of conscience are always difficult and, in such circumstance, there can be several 'victims'.

I wonder if the couple eventually got their problems solved and are back in 'safe space'? One can only hope they did and are.

mp