...the OP's apparent comment on excessive neediness in some posters?...

No. I am asking for people's input about the opposite phenomenon, that some folks go too far in coddling a chosen person/group/illness/whatever is their "bag." And I suspect that who is coddled by whom (and who is not and by whom) is not a matter of anything but personal prejudice unaided by proximity.

Proximity does matter, too. We can see that just by the posts in this thread-- people who actually know me have tended to know what I meant. People who do not... have characterized a few short words in their own fashion, to put it kindly (one PM was a lulu of threats). Vive la Mudcat-- I know we all do that. But I find it very interesting to learn from how it works. Most folks who consider themselves "works in progress" seem to think that way, too.

Kendall asked upthread (something to the effect) if I ever stop to think I am wrong. Here's a possible surprise-- actually, are you asking? I wake up most mornings sure that I have been all wrong the day before, only to find quite a bit of evidence to the contrary awaiting me.

This is a personal issue that I work on, but I work much harder to be sure I am correct. Ten years' worth of observation and wondering is, for me, a relatively normal length of time to wonder about stuff.


As usual, most of the power I find in the replies to this topic has come from those voicing their ideas in love and/or goodwill. I tend to pay more attention to those sorts of input, in the sort term; but I regularly meet with a bunch of people convened on purpose for their wildly different views. I treasure that they differ from mine, because I trust the collection of voices much more than any single voice, or subgroup of voices.

This has been true across the many communities with which I have been actively involved, and it's true here, too.

As is also true of many of us, I sorely miss the voices that are "gone before us." Giac and Rick, in particular, had ways of making so many things so clear.... as I know the rest of us miss particular voices as well.

BTW Gnu-- "what is for supper" is what folks have said is helpful to their own household organizing. If it doesn't float you boat-- eat me! :~)

~Susan