:) Tam!!! I love your dream!!! Thanks for sharing that!! Personally, I am awake from having some strange dreams tonight....the one that stands out the most was finding a child lost in the woods...it was very cold out and she was making handprints in the mud. Strange.

And Stilly....I wonder if there aren't millions of people living with cancer or survivors who think they got off easy. I know I whine a lot and yes, I do have intense pain sometimes....but in my heart, sometimes I think I should shut the hell up. I am not nauseous every day, I have people to talk to, I have doctors that I like and trust, I can move for 2 out of 3 weeks, my port (while I hated having it done) went in smoothly...no infecttions.....I could go on and on. I feel very damn lucky and blessed and cringe when I see others going through even more. As I sat in the waiting room to be called in to have my port needle set up, the paramedics came into the clinic with a stretcher. A few minutes later they wheeled out an elderly woman who was so thin, frail and pale. It felt like my heart stopped....I know that every single patient waiting in that waiting room must have felt the same...that could be me. How lucky am I to be sitting here breathing on my own?
    I think cancer is cancer is cancer...if you've heard the words, "You have cancer" you know the fear, the frustration and anxiety...no matter the course of treatment. It does something to you deep inside and really does change a person's perspective in it's own unique way.
    I had a discussion with my Dr. during this visit about my memory and ensuing fog and he said, "Yep, chemo brain." I might be in a fog sometimes and not remember things but I DO know what's going on. I think that people undergoing chemo have SO much on their minds that sometimes things just get crowded out.
    Anyway.....I'm with you in your thinking that I got off the hook fairly easily.....but then again, I think cancer, is cancer is cancer and I wish NONE of us ever had to go through it at all. EVER.

Michelle who is patiently waiting for her Ambien to kick in. Why can I never get a good night's sleep? ARG.