Hi, I'm not sure if anyone follows this thread any longer. I just came across the link, and I think you might enjoy a ballad I wrote a few months ago.


The Ballad of Lady Mondegreen

'Oh highlands mine and lowlands, tell me where you have been?
You've slain the Earl of Moray and Lady Mondegreen.'
King James caressed the corpses: 'Was all my love in vain?
My world is dead, I feel like a miteside in the rain.'

Her heart was light with passion under her stiff baleen:
amongst the dappled roses walked Lady Mondegreen.
This must have been the happiest day of her carefree life,
because King James had told her that he would kill his wife.

The bonny birds were singing in oak and chestnut tree,
the sun dispersed so brightly his rays on land and sea,
the jasmine spread its fragrance, and soon she would be queen:
a spring in every step had Lady Mondegreen.

The Lady was a tomboy when no one looked, and as
she rode out in the country, she swapped her satin dress
for her beloved kilt which her lover disapproved
of in strong terms – however, the girl remained unmoved.

'I want to meet the Lady', the King said to his aide,
but no more in the palace, because I am afraid
the Queen might smell a rodent. Fetch Huntly, he will ride
out to the Earl of Moray where I shall meet my bride.'

Huntly received his orders: 'Go tell the Earl I need
his house; first fetch the Lady from Rathven, and make speed!
I want her kilt torn, mangled! Then bring a candle and,
once lit, a cross. His faith will serve me well, my friend!'

The loyal Huntly saddled his horse; he was not keen
on this foul task but hurried to Lady Mondegreen.
He brought her to the Earl who obliged and took his coat,
and then he grabbed the Lady and cut her pallid throat.

He gently lit a candle and held it in one hand
while stabbing with the other the Earl, the monarch's friend.
He cut his face severely, and what he – there's no doubt –
did to the Lady's body I shall not write about.

The King arrived in very high spirits at the scene
to greet the Earl of Moray and Lady Mondegreen.
'What happened?', he lamented as he broke down and cried.
'I carried out your orders', his trusted friend replied.

'I want her killed, torn, mangled! Then bring a candle, and
one slit across his face will serve me well, my friend!' -
'Oh highlands mine and lowlands, tell me where you have been?
You've slain the Earl of Moray and Lady Mondegreen.'

© Frank L. Ludwig

(By the way, the miteside in the rain is something that took me decades to solve. It was Tim Curry in the Rocky Horror Picture: 'Everywhere it's been the same, like I'm outside in the rain.')