THE WOODEN LEGG'D PARSON

TUNE:- "Dumble Dum Deary"

  A Barber there was named Timothy Brigs,
  Quite famous he was for making good Wigs,
  'Till with a lass called Beckey Bell,
  Slap over the ears in love he fell.
          With his dumble dum deary, &c.
  
  So they went to the Church the knot to tie,
  To a wooden legg'd parson, one Jonathan Sly,
  If you'd seen him I'm sure you'd have laughed at him plump,
  As he mounted the pulpit stairs with a stump.
          With his dumble dum deary, &c.
  
  They had only been married a week or two,
  When Beckey turned out a most terrible shrew,
  "No comfort I have with this woman" he said,
  So I'll go back to th' Parson and I'll be un-wed.
          With his dumble dum deary, &c.
  
  So he went to the Parson, and said, Mr. Sly,
  If I stop with yond' woman I'm sure I shall die,
  You know, sir, you made us two into one,
  So I'm come for to know if we can't be undone.
          With his dumble dum deary, &c.
  
  The Parson said that this is a thing rather new,
  I don't know that I've power my flock to undo,
  But in hopes that you'll lead a more happy life,
  I'll call at your house and admonish your wife.
          With his dumble dum deary, &c.
  
  The Barber quite pleas'd went a taking his glass,
  And the Parson stumped off for to lecture the lass;
  When the barber went home, laws! what should he see,
  But the Parson with Beckey at top of his knee.
          Singing dumble dum deary, &c.
  
  The Barber at this bristled up every hair,
  Says he, Mr. Sly, what are you doing there;
  Why you know that you wanted undoing good man,
  So you see that I'm trying as hard as I can.
          With his dumble dum deary, &c.
  
  Yes, I think I'm undone as I ne'er was before,
  So he kick'd Mr. Parson streight out of door;
  There he lay in the street, while his wooden leg stood
  Like a spade sticking up in a cart load of mud.
          With his dumble dum deary, &c.
  
  They lived after this rather more reconcil'd,
  And in nine months from then she brought him a child,
  But the Barber he hung himself up on a peg
  When he found the child born with a new wooden leg.
          With his dumble dum deary, &c.