Boy, that must have been a night to remember, LadyJean. ;-) I didn't think that stuff worked on men...not that it would be much use to me anyway if it did...

But here's how to attract a Dachshund:

1. roll in fresh shit
2. roll in decaying roadkill
3. carry armfuls of fresh-cooked sausages or hotdogs

You will be surrounded by adoring Dachshunds in NO TIME FLAT!!! And they will follow you about, a la the Pied Piper of Hamelin. (Other dogs may quickly gather too.)