Here's one I made up

Land of the purple heather
Land of the rainy weather
Land where the people gather
Scotland the Brave

Land of smelly Irish stew
Land of yummy haggis too
Land of real hot bobbies too (phew)
Scotland the Brave

Land of ugly Dakota Fanning
Land of soccer coach Andy Manning
Land of losers 'Glasgow Panning'*
Scotland the Brave

Land of the mooning grannies
By the railroad showin' their fannies
Land of the long work hours
Scotland the Brave!

* a fictional soccer team