"You mean we're really Mistresses/Masters of the Universe and know better than 'Mother Nature'? Isn't that attitude at the very heart of the problem, Lizzie?"

Nope. I mean we, as a species, have seriously fucked Mother Nature up bigtime and it's our duty to start repairing some of that damage.

"And by acting like a silly, patronising git, and talking down to me on the telly, Chris Packham hasn't inspired me, personally, to do anything. I find his painfully forced 'zaniness' very, very trying."

Chris Packham has encouraged thousands of youngsters to share his wild enthusiasm for wild things. He's not your 'traddie conservationist' I guess, more like a Seth Lakeman version, who has wild hair and lots of bubbles that get up the noses of Grumpy Ol' Sods..


"I could say the same about Kate 'you-could-probably-have-me-if-you-played-your-cards-right-but-oh-do-shut-up-woman' Humble."

Now *that* made me chuckle, Shimmy! Actually, Kate's admitted to being in complete awe of Chris, as she's loved his work for many a long year..and she's totally smitten like a kitten, that's plain to see.

"By the way, who is this 'Mother Earth'? Is she married to Mr Earth? If I touch her, isn't she likely to sue me for sexual harrassment?"

Probably she will at some point, but she's way too busy suing everyone else for Grevious Bodily Harm at the moment, from BP to the bloke who gave the go-ahead to enlarge Manchester Airport..

And Mother Earth is married to Father Time, who knows that Time is Running Out, Bigtime, so he's suggested that well meaning folks get out there and bloody well plant trees by the tens of thousands, amongst many other things....


Your go, Shimmy... ;0)