Here's my transcription from the YouTube video. There are a couple of gaps where I couldn't understand the words. I have numbered the lines to facilitate further discussion.

This tune is a pastiche of several more-or-less familiar tunes. The ones I recognize, I have linked to a Mudcat MIDI file.


WIRELESS WORRIES

[Tune: THE WEARING OF THE GREEN]
01 Now, my wife went mad on the wireless, and it really was a sin.
02 The way she nagged me made me feel I should be listening in.
03 I used to be a happy sort of fellow, it is true,
04 Until the day I bought a pole to fix the aerial to.

[Tune: ?]
05 It was some pole! You really couldn't doubt it:
06 Fifty feet long with lots of weight about it.
07 The man remarked, "We'll send it free."
08 I said, "Don't bother, for you see,
09 I've brought a handcart here with me
10 To wheel it home."

[Tune: THE GIRL I LEFT BEHIND ME]
11 So off I went. Four p'licemen blinked, but they never seemed to mind me.
12 And as I went, I left a dray in an accident behind me.
13 I turned a corner rather sharp. I should have been more wary.
14 I caught a fat old lady, plonk! right in her little Mary.
15 Her husband he was most annoyed and cried with many a splutter:
16 "You are a goat." I said, "I know. That's why I had to butt her."
17 I must admit I lost my head. I had no sense left in it.
18 I waved the pole to left, to right, and in another minute,

[Tune: ?]
19 I put it through the window.
20 I put it through a window.
21 I put it through a window, then started running home.

[Tune: HOME SWEET HOME]
22 Home, home, sweet, sweet home!
23 When you've got to pull on the handcart, there's no place like home.

[Tune: ?]
24 Then I stuck up that pole with a ...
25 That it shouldn't fall down, for my fear was intense,
26 But when I got it finished, the wife shouted, "John,
27 You've forgotten to fasten the aerial on."

[Tune: YANKEE DOODLE]
28 My thoughts were wicked, I admit, but what I said was badder.
29 To a builder's yard close by I went to fetch a ladder.
30 I found that it was far too short. The thought of murder filled me.
31 I swore that I would climb that pole yet, even if it killed me.

[Tune: THE GRAND OLD DUKE OF YORK]
32 But as I scrambled up, up, up, the ladder tumbled down.
33 As I was only halfway up, I was neither up nor down.

[Tune: THE VICAR OF BRAY]
34 "Be careful, dear!" the wife cried out, in accents most disjointed.
35 "That pole is full of rusty nails and splinters sharply pointed."
36 I heeded not her warning, for to get down I was yearning,
37 But as I slid, a splinter ran into my seat of learning.

[Tune: AULD LANG SYNE]
38 The ... may listen in. My wireless craze has gone.
39 That pole is now used by the wife to hang the washing on.

[Tune: RULE BRITANNIA]
40 Rule, Britannia! Britannia rules the waves.
41 I shall never, never rule the wireless waves.