Hey, I'm going to the Fitness Center several times a week -- and not just to pick up my wife, either! No sir! I'm doing Nautilus-type exercises and rowing machine and stationary bicycles and walking and all sorts of stuff. And I don't have to pay a dime for it, unless the catch me coming through the window (actually, it's paid for by my health insurance).

An irate father once threatened to remove bumps on my coastline but I managed to convince him it was my friend Bob's doing.