The following version was just posted to the Yahoo!group of the AA hall I sobered up in. This is not our typical topic, but it's welcome, and seems to be different from any of the specific versions I've found here or elsewhere:

DO YOUR BALLS HANG LOW?
Tune: Sailor's Hornpipe

Tiddly winks young man, get a woman if you can,
If you cann't get a woman get a clean old man,
From the lofty heights of Malta to the shores of old Gibraltar,
Can you do the double shuffle with your balls in a can.

Do Your balls hang low, can you swing 'em to and fro?
Can you tie 'em in a knot, can you tie 'em in a bow?
Can you swing'em o'er your shoulder like a European soldier?
When you do a double shuffle do your balls hang low.

Do your balls hang tight, can you hide 'em in a fight?
Can you tuck 'en neath your arm, can you keep 'em out of sight?
Are they tough enough to buckle up another man's hard knuckles?
When you do a double shuffle do your balls hang tight.

Do your balls hang loose, as loose as a goose?
Can you slide 'em down the hall, can you bounce 'em off the wall?
Does it really make you stammer when you hit 'em with a hammer?
When you do a double shuffle, do your balls hang loose?

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This is the first one I've seen that says "European" instead of "Continental"; doesn't feel right. Otherwise not bad at all.

Haruo