ELECTION, OR BUST!
TUNE: Verses - A Gay Caballero, (aka The Limerick Song)
      Chorus - Cielito Lindo
New Words: Trapper (Al Boyce)


A candidate, Venezualan
Behind in the polls was a-trailin'
So he'd raise campaign cash
For an 11th hour dash
With a raffle to keep him from failin'

CHORUS:
Aye, Aye, Aye, Aye
I'll buy a ticket!
Sell me a chance for your campaign finance
And I'll win me more than a handful!


He'd canvass professors and scholars
And women with fine frilly collars
For Bolivars in hand
Tot'ling 25 grand
(Or in U.S., exacty six dollars!)

CHORUS:
Aye, Aye, Aye, Aye
I'll buy a ticket!
Sell me a chance for your campaign finance
To win me some huge tracts of land!


As as prize for each patron's donation
He explained with a great excitation
For their six-buck advance
They'd each get one chance
For Mammary Amplification!

CHORUS:
Aye, Aye, Aye, Aye
I'll buy a ticket!
Sell me a chance for your campaign finance
And we will become your door knockers!


As enticement for joining his caucus
In the race for control of Caracas
Into surgery she gets
With her tinier tits
And come home with giant Maracas!

CHORUS:
Aye, Aye, Aye, Aye
I'll buy a ticket!
Sell me a chance for your campaign finance
And we will become bosom buddies!


Gustavo, the best of promoters
Did not win, was not one of the floaters
But he married the winner
And each night over dinner
Keeps abreast of one of his voters!

CHORUS:
Aye, Aye, Aye, Aye
I'll buy a ticket!
Sell me a chance for your campaign finance
And I'll win me more than a handful!