The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #133322   Message #3023929
Posted By: akenaton
04-Nov-10 - 09:22 PM
Thread Name: BS: An astute take on the Nov. 2010 election
Subject: RE: BS: An astute take on the Nov. 2010 election
Its not really about the election Joe, its about distasteful stereotyping.....read Hawks post.

Then read this piece of "humour" which our members appear to appreciate.
Personally, although branded a racist,homophobe,bigot here, I dont happen to find jokes about sick people, funny.

Home News Society JUNKIES TO BE RENAMED 'HEROIN BUFFS'



      
24-08-10

DRUG abusers are to be renamed 'heroin buffs' in recognition of their in-depth knowledge and appreciation of the world's finest narcotics.




Exam time at the University of HeroinThe UK Drug Policy Commission said terms like 'junkie' and 'addict' stigmatise decent, productive members of society who live ankle deep in vomit and would stab you right in the head for 50 pence.

Deputy director, Julian Cook, said: "In the same way that Dan Snow is a history buff or Rick Stein is really into haddock, can we not also apply the mantel of buff to someone who has taken the time and effort to develop a connoisseur's palate for opium derivatives?

"We should acknowledge the intellectual commitment and passion of those have decided to live in a cesspit, eat nothing but their own scabs and inject themselves eight times a day with a needle they found stuck up a dead rat."

He added: "I recently met an expert who could not only distinguish between Afghan and Burmese heroin, but could tell you when it was harvested, who mixed it with Vim and how many heads the local warlord had hacked off that year.

"But where's his six-part series on BBC4?"

Stephen Malley, a crack aficionado from Hatfield said: "I've been building up my collection of antique pipes for 20 years. This one was hand made in 1867 by Martin Van Hegelen, one of the finest glass blowers in Rotterdam. It's really quite exquisite and gets me totally fucking mental bastard off my tits.

"By the way, if I throw up blood on you, please do forgive me but I'm researching an article on some fucked-up Cambodian shit for the London Review of Smack."

Wayne Hayes, who lives in Stephen Malley's bath, added: "I am hoping to complete my Master of Heroin exams later this year and then take up a fellowship at the Doherty Institute in Kandahar.

"Or I might just keep filling this bath with piss."